[Miracle] Red Queen Race
He stood, panting, shoulders shaking, still not quite certain if he had really done what he had done. But his hand hurt, his bones still vibrated sending tremors up his arm, telling him that yes, yes he had. Ilya shivered and looked down.
Marty lay sprawled across the floor, one hand cradling his jaw. When he moved his hand away, Ilya could see it was swelling already.
“I…”
Marty glared up at him. “Are we done?”
~~
“I’m glad you’re back, Dany.”
“I’m glad to be back.” And Dany smiled that gap toothed smile, and he looked so happy that Ilya just couldn’t resist reaching over and giving his friend a quick hug.
But the hug turned into a kiss turned into sex in the showers, and before Ilya knew what he was doing he was back in that familiar pattern, following Dany to his car, making plans to stay at Dany’s house.
Marty was coming this weekend.
“But Ilya…” Dany pleaded, his eyes wide and sorrowful.
“I…”
“That’s fine, Ilya. You can’t miss team bonding stuff. It’s okay; I’ll see you some other time.” And Marty hung up.
Ilya blinked at his cell phone, watching the screen change from ‘connected’ to ‘call ended: 00:24’. A twenty four second lie.
Dany smiled. “You ready?”
~~
“Are we done?” Marty spat, making sure to duck his head as he got to his feet. And Ilya knew it was to hide the tears that were threatening to fall, even though he couldn’t see them. So he strengthened his resolve.
“No. You are not leaving.”
Marty looked up to glare, eyes glittering, though now Ilya couldn’t tell if it was because of held back tears or anger.
“Why? What’s the point of me staying?”
Ilya swallowed hard, trying to force the words out properly. “I want you to.”
“You want Dany. Stop lying to me, Ilya.” Marty sighed, a shuddering sigh that made his shoulders quiver, and closed his eyes. “I’m so tired.”
“I am NOT lying.” Ilya drew in a deep breath, wishing there was some easy way to make Marty see this. Wishing that he could just rip his chest open and let Marty see what was written on his heart, or, in a less dramatic fashion, project his thoughts onto a wall. “I just…it was easy. To do what I did. Not that it was right, it was just easy.”
“Ilya. Stop.”
“No. I don’t want easy anymore, okay?” Ilya yelled hoarsely. “With you…with you, it’s always so hard. You treat me like I am some fucking glass doll. I’m not, Marty. I am not broken now. So stop fixing me.”
Marty opened his eyes slowly and drew in a deep breath. “What do you want me to do then?”
“Just love me.” Ilya took a step forward, gently touching the growing bruise on Marty’s face with his fingertips. “Do you?”
Marty shivered slightly, tilting his head back to look at Ilya. “Of course I do.”
Ilya smiled softly. “We change for each other, okay? Keep changing so we can keep fitting together. Because that’s what I want.”
Marty turned his face so he could kiss the palm of Ilya’s hand and whispered a promise.